Tomorrow is Father’s Day.
Father’s Day is usually such a fun filled day in our house. Usually starting with my husband being woken up early by his son, stepson and daughter. The excitement on their faces as they gently open our bedroom door and greet him, by jumping on our bed! Then the exchanging of gifts and cards they have secretly kept hidden for days. Cards so carefully made at school can now be shown off.
The children then help me prepare his breakfast and quietly take it upstairs for him to enjoy in bed – I say ‘enjoy’ but for anyone who knows my husband well will know that he detests eating in bed! But he does the right thing and ‘enjoys’ his breakfast in bed. Although his tea may be too milky or his toast may be burnt he savours every last bit and tells the children it is the best tea and toast he has ever had. The joy on our children’s faces warms my heart. They are so proud of themselves.
The day then consists of a family day out, picnic in the park or ‘Dad’s Choice’ of restaurant. Either way, whatever we do, it’s together and we make happy memories.
Tomorrow will be slightly different. Although the cards the children have made are indeed safely hidden for the morning and we have planned a lovely day for him – hopefully the weather will be kind – But we all know there is one less card to open, one less present to unwrap, one less kiss to share, one less cuddle to recieve and one less person present in the memories we now create- there always will be.
Rebecca leaving us has broken my husbands heart. Unfortunately the stereotypical perception of a ‘mans’ way of dealing with grief – being that they go back to work, go back to life and move on – is so far beyond what’s real. Only the mothers of an angel know this is not the case – not in the slightest. Father’s are heartbroken too, they grieve, they hurt and yes, they cry. They too had dreams and hopes for their unborn child. Their hopes and dreams have been shattered too.
Father’s Day will be so hard, but my husband is still a father, a father to his son, his stepson and our daughter. He is now also a father to our angel daughter.
I wish him a gentle Father’s Day, surrounded with love, love from us all.
Don’t cry for me Daddy,
For I am right here.
Although you can’t see me,
I can see your tears.
I visit you often,
I go to work with you each day,
And when it’s time for you to close your eyes,
On your pillow is where I lay.
I hold your hand and stroke your hair,
And whisper in your ear.
If you’re sad today Daddy,
Remember, I am here.
God took me home,
This we know is true.
But you’ll always be my Daddy,
Even though I’m not with you.
We will never be apart,
For everytime you think of me,
Please know I’m in your Heart.